Second Wind

Chapter Thirty-One

Joey

The social worker that Paul had talked about called just before lunch on Monday. I suppose it was a bit sexist of me but I was expecting it to be a woman. Instead I heard a soft male voice with just a trace of a drawl. While he sounded friendly enough, I was nervous. Ben always said that in general women tended to be more accepting of male homosexuality than men. The social worker said he wanted to interview all of the members of our household as soon as possible. Ben and I had made plans to register at town hall that afternoon and I figured there was no way the social worker could make it the same day anyhow, so I suggested the next afternoon. After checking his schedule he agreed to come to the house at three o'clock. He would be able to talk to me first and then interview James when he got home from school. By the time he finished with James, Ben should be getting in from work.

Ben came home from work a little after two-thirty. I was just getting Connor up from his nap and he joined me in Connor's room as I got him dressed.

"So what do we wear to something like this? Should we get all dressed up, like we're getting married?"

"You've got me. I've never done this before. But it's a pretty simple thing from what others have told me. There's no ceremony or anything. We just fill out some papers. We can wear whatever we want."

In the end we decided to wear suits. We'd probably be way overdressed for what was essentially a simple bureaucratic procedure, but it was an important moment in our relationship. We'd already privately committed ourselves to each other many times. Now we were making it legal. I couldn't help but make comparisons to getting married to Jenny. She and I had been engaged for over a year and spent all of that time planning every detail of our special day. This, on the other hand, we'd decided on the night before and we were squeezing the five minute process in after work. I thought that our love for each other deserved so much more, but I still couldn't help but be a bit awed by the step we were taking.

I dressed Connor up in the little suit I'd bought him for Christmas and we were ready to go get James at Madison High. When he walked up to the car outside the school he stopped short.

"You guys are gonna have to take me home to change. You make me look like a bum. I can't go with you looking like this."

He was wearing his usual loose jeans hanging low on his hips and oversized t-shirt and a cap turned around backwards. That teen uniform made most boys look like slobs but James always looked neat and crisp no matter what he was wearing. We tried to assure him that he looked fine but he insisted, so we stopped by the house. We kept our coats on and waited in the family room while he raced to his room and changed in record time. When he reappeared in what seemed like only a minute he was wearing khaki slacks, a dress shirt and a tie. The last time I'd seen him dressed up was at his confirmation a couple of years before and he was just a cute kid then. I realized he was rapidly growing into a handsome man.

When we got to the borough clerk's office I wasn't sure what to ask for. Ben seemed to know what he was doing and explained to the clerk what we were there for. She reached under the counter and came up with some forms. She went over them with us, explaining what to fill in where. James kept Connor occupied while Ben and I filled out the forms. When we were done we showed her the documents we'd brought with us, proving who we were and that we lived together. The clerk looked everything over and signed the form and that was it. We were partnered. Or registered. Or something.

We marked the moment with a brief kiss. James looked a little uncomfortable, but no more so than the clerk. Connor took it all in stride and laughed and clapped as we each kissed him as well.

When we got back to the house we shared a somewhat more passionate kiss. James just shook his head as he watched.

"Don’t you guys ever stop? I guess I should be getting used to it after a few weeks, but it still looks weird to see two guys kiss."

"It feels anything but weird, James." Ben proved it by kissing me again.

"I'll have to take your word for it. Maybe someday I'll find out for myself."

"I'm sure you will, James. You're going to have guys tripping all over themselves to kiss you when you get a little older."

Ben cocked his head to one side and thought for a minute. "You know, there's a gay youth group that meets in South Orange. Maybe you'd like to start going to their meetings."

"You tryin' to get me hooked up, Ben? I don't think I'm ready for that."

"Not hooked up, exactly. You might not feel like you're ready to have a boyfriend, but it would be nice if you could have a gay friend or two your own age."

"I'll think about it. I'm just getting used to being around you two guys."

We all went to our rooms to change into more comfortable clothes, then I went into the kitchen to make dinner while Ben headed for his office. James brought his homework into the family room and worked on that while Connor played with Lula. All of a sudden it felt like a typical evening at home. It was hard to believe that Ben and I had just done something momentous in our relationship, that we were now legally linked together. I made up my mind that as soon as the custody hearing was over we were definitely going to have to plan a big party. This milestone deserved recognition.

I was just getting ready to put dinner on the table when Ben came up behind me, grabbed me around the waist and kissed me on the side of my neck.

"How about we skip bowling tonight and stay in to consummate our new legal status, babe?"

"Your team's in first place and it's getting close to the end of the season. You'd better bowl or Mike and Scott will kill you."

"You're not very romantic tonight. Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, I guess. I keep thinking that I should feel different. What we did today is so important, but it feels like any other day."

"I know what you mean. I think that's partly because it came out of nowhere. We didn't have time to anticipate it, so it was over before it really sunk in. Plus there's all of the other crap that's been going on lately."

"Is that a technical legal term? Other crap?"

He shrugged. "It's hard to live all those years with a lawyer and not pick up some of the terminology."

"Tell you what, we'll cut out of bowling as soon as it's over and come home and do a little consummating." I grabbed his butt and gave it a squeeze. "I think I could get into that."

"I know I could get into you getting into that."

A groan came from the doorway. "Looks like another night of being kept up by the sounds of unbridled passion. What am I supposed to tell my algebra teacher when I fall asleep in class?"

Ben

Becoming domestic partners the way we did almost felt wrong. It should have been something spectacular, the most important moment of my life. Instead, it reminded more me of when I got Lula's dog license right after I moved to town. I knew Joey was nervous about the custody lawsuit and I wanted this to be as beautiful an occasion as possible. I was concerned that the borough clerk wouldn't have the forms. New Jersey had only legalized domestic partnership the summer before and this was a small suburban town, after all. So I called before I left the office to let them know we were coming. We didn't need an appointment but that gave them time to find the forms and go over them, so there wouldn't be any last minute snags.

I even suggested we wear suits. I generally don’t like wearing a tie when I'm not in the office but we needed something to make it feel like a special occasion. I was glad that James wanted to dress up as well. He was gradually warming up to me and getting used to being in a gay household. I kept thinking that he shouldn't be having so much trouble adjusting to us since he was gay himself but I had to remind myself that he'd never known anyone gay before. And he had been raised by Vinnie, after all.

Afterward, the day seemed even less special. We had a nice family dinner, shrimp fra diavolo; the shrimp because it was my favorite, the diavolo because we both loved hot, spicy food. Joey heated up a little plain marinara sauce for Connor. No point in frying his little taste buds before they were even fully developed. I offered to skip bowling so we could try to make it a romantic evening but Joey insisted we go. He was right. If we'd stayed home we probably would have played with Connor, helped James with his homework and then watched TV. A comfortable evening, but not romantic.

We didn't even get to celebrate with our friends in the league. As luck would have it my team was on the last lanes for our league, only five lanes from where the Napoli brothers were bowling. We didn’t want word of our visit to town hall to get to them so we kept quiet about it. It was almost like Joey was back in the closet. I understood that he wanted to tell his parents first but I made him promise to find time to do it before the end of the week. It was bad enough not being able to have a big celebration about our partnership; I didn't want to keep it a secret.

The custody suit was no longer a secret, however. The Napoli grapevine had been working overtime since our visit to Joey's parent's house the day before. Both Anthony and Sal came over to ask us how we were handling it. Joey spent several minutes discussing the case with them while I bowled. I was surprised to see John come over for a few words with Joey as well.

As the evening passed, we were a bit more affectionate than usual. After all, it was a special day for us even if no one else knew it. I noticed a glare or two from Vinnie but paid him no mind. My teammate Mike noticed the extra hugs and touching, too, and Joey and I both stifled laughs when he jokingly referred to us as newlyweds.

"So are you guys looking forward to the Gotham tournament? It's too bad you're not staying at the host hotel, though we might have trouble getting out of your room to bowl if you did."

"Is that coming up already? I keep thinking it's not until spring."

"Duh, the first day of spring was last week in case you didn't notice, Ben. Next Sunday is Easter so the tournament is less than two weeks off."

Mike and Scott entered a lot of gay bowling tournaments and had been after me to go with them for over a year. Since Gotham was the New York tournament and this year it was actually being held in Jersey City, it was local which made it very convenient. So Joey and I had agreed to form a four-man team with the guys. With everything going on with Joey and his family, I'd completely forgotten the event.

"I guess we're as ready as we'll be. Joey hasn't had much practice bowling as a sub lately but it's not much different than league bowling, right?"

"No, except it's nine games over two days. Mike was right that it's a shame you won’t be at the hotel. Half the fun of a tournament is the hospitality suite with all of the drinking and whoring around."

"Well, Ben and I don’t drink that much and we are definitely not into whoring around."

"Don’t pay any attention to Scott. Just 'cause he's a whore doesn’t mean everyone else is. Tournaments are just great social occasions. We'll have to get you guys to go away with us for one sometime."

"I'm sure we'll get to do some socializing at this one, but it's tough enough for me to take two days off from the nursery in the spring. I don’t think I could do any traveling at this time of year."

"There are tournaments all year round. Just say when it's convenient and we'll set it up."

When we got home James had gone to bed. Joey stopped by Connor's room to check on him and then joined me in the bedroom. He softly closed the door behind him and gave me a devilish look.

"Ready to do some consummating?"

He walked across the room and pulled my shirt out of my pants, running his fingers lightly up under it, tickling my sides.

"Ready and willing. You know the partnership isn’t legal until we make love."

"Liar." He ran his tongue up the side of my neck and grabbed my earlobe between his teeth.

"It's true. Didn't you read the small print? We have to go back tomorrow and swear to the borough clerk that you gave me a good pounding."

"Hmm, that doesn’t sound legal but maybe we'd better not take any chances." He ran his tongue around the inside edge of my ear, sending shivers all though me, then plunged the tip into my ear. He reached around behind me and grabbed my ass, trying to shove a finger into my crack though my pants. "I'll pound that extra hard, just to be sure. That okay with you?"

I ground my hips into his, pressing my erection against the bulge his hard Italian salami was making in his pants, and he responded by pressing his hand even harder into my ass. "As hard as you like. We do want to make sure it's legal, after all."

We quickly stripped each other's clothes off and fell onto the bed. After brief though passionate foreplay, my love drilled me long, hard and deep. So much so that later as I lay in his arms I wondered if I was going to be able to sit at my desk the next day at work. We were both exhausted and our new status was definitely consummated.

"Many more nights like that and we're going to have some explaining to do to James' algebra teacher." Joey giggled. "If he's got old Miss Thompson I don’t think her heart could take the details."

I was up as soon as the alarm went off in the morning, although I felt like sleeping until noon. I had an early appointment with Paul at his office so I could give my sworn statement. I originally thought I wouldn't have to make a statement since I knew nothing about Joey's in-laws or their relationship with Connor other than what Joey had told me, but Paul explained that my relationship with Joey was the central issue in the case. Also, he wanted to ask me about my relationship with Connor. I gently lowered myself into a chair opposite Paul's desk and he gave a knowing smile when he saw my discomfort.

"Thanks for coming in, Ben. Joey and his parents are coming by tomorrow morning, separately, of course. Once I get all of these depositions done I'll get a hearing scheduled with the family court."

"What do you think of the case so far?" This was the first time I'd had a chance to ask Paul without Joey being there and knew he'd give me an honest opinion without any sugar-coating.

"I talked to both attorneys on the other side, the one who filed the suit here and the one who the Reynolds originally talked to in Georgia. While no lawyer is ever going to say anything negative about his client or his case, I got the impression from both of them that they're not expecting much from this. Reading between the lines I got a bit of an idea where all of this is coming from."

"From all I've heard they don’t care about Connor at all. Maybe they think that since Joey is gay he deceived their daughter so they think they're defending Jenny by attacking Joey."

"That could have something to do with it, but I think that they are more concerned with their own image than anything else. Joey said that the only reason they came to see Connor when they were here over the holidays was that they wanted to appear to their friends and relatives to be caring grandparents. So I think they filed this suit for the same reason, so their friends and family around here will think they care. I get the feeling that everyone on the other side is just going through the motions on this."

"I didn't think my opinion of the Reynolds could be any lower, but if they're putting Joey through all of this hell just for appearances, that's pretty disgusting."

Paul had me sworn in and then began to question me about my relationship with Joey. I felt a bit uncomfortable at first, sharing these personal feelings with my ex, but Paul wasn't interested in the juicy details and kept the questioning on a professional level. He also asked me about my relationship with Connor and I explained how I'd gone from initially being almost afraid of him to becoming completely enthralled with him. He also asked a few questions about James and how he was fitting into the household.

When we were done with the official part of the appointment I didn’t have time to stick around and talk. I was missing quite a bit of time from work as it was. As I got up to leave, Paul came around his desk and gave me a hug.

"I want to repeat a couple of things I've said before, Ben. First, you're a lucky man to have found someone like Joey. I'm happy for you. But he's a lucky man, too. You're very special. Second, I can tell you're nearly as stressed out about this custody issue as Joey. Don’t be. They haven't got a case. I assure you that everything will be fine."

Joey

The closer it got to three the more nervous I got. I kept telling myself I had nothing to worry about, but I was about to be interviewed by someone whose job it was to decide whether or not I was a good parent. The doorbell rang a minute before the appointed hour and I jumped. I opened the door to a slim middle-aged black man about my height. He smiled and held out a business card.

"Mr. Napoli? I'm Charles Decker from DYFS. We spoke on the telephone yesterday."

I took the card and shook his hand. "Nice to meet you. C'mon in."

I closed the door behind him and took his coat. Connor was standing behind me, hanging onto my leg. Mr. Decker looked down at him and smiled.

"And this must be Connor, the young man who's causing all this trouble."

Connor held out his right hand and looked very serious as he shook hands with the social worker. I reached down and picked him up, putting him on my right hip. Mr. Decker looked back and forth between the two of us.

"Well, we don’t need a DNA test to know that you're his father. He's a miniature of you. And quite the charmer, too."

He asked to see the house so I gave him a brief tour before leading him to the family room where he took a seat. "Can I get you something to drink, coffee, tea?"

"A glass of water would be nice, thanks."

I left Connor on the couch and went into the kitchen. When I came back with the water Mr. Decker was having a one-sided conversation with him. He appeared to be totally at ease with a toddler. I sat on the couch, ready for the interview to begin. I must have looked as tense as I felt.

"Please try to relax, Mr. Napoli. I'm not here to take your son away from you." He smiled reassuringly. "This is only a preliminary visit to make sure he is in no immediate danger."

"Well, I know you won’t just take my word for it, but I can assure you of that. And please call me Joey. Mr. Napoli is my father."

He smiled again. There was something comforting about this man. "Okay, and you call me Charles. I'll be meeting your father on Thursday so it will make it less confusing only having one Mr. Napoli." I smiled back at him, thinking about how confused he would be if he had to deal with all of the Mr. Napolis in my family.

The interview, or interrogation as I'd been thinking about it, wasn't bad at all. Charles was completely at ease with discussing my relationship with Ben and that put me at ease. I was used to the hesitation and uncertainty of Anthony and Pop when it came to talking about Ben, as if they wanted to be accepting but were unsure of what words to use. But Charles was very matter-of-fact about it, as if he ran into families headed by gay couples every day. I found I was able to relax and discuss my life as if it were just that, my life, and not some strange existence that I had to explain or justify.

I had just reached the point in the story where my parents found out about me when James got home from school. I introduced them and James offered to wait in his room while we finished up.

Charles watched James as he left the room. "If it weren't for the age difference I'd swear he was yours as well, Joey."

"You wouldn't say that if you saw his father."

I finished up the story of my coming out and then gave Charles a brief recap of how James came to be living with us. Then it was time for James' interview. I went down the hall to his room and got him. I gave him a hug and whispered in his ear, "Relax, he's a good guy."

I left the two of them alone and took Connor to the bedroom. I'd already put some of his toys in there so we had something to keep ourselves occupied with. I was feeling a lot better about everything than I had been earlier in the afternoon. It seemed like no time had passed when Ben walked into the room. I jumped up from the floor to hug him.

"Hey, did you meet Charles out there?"

"Charles, is it? You're on pretty friendly terms with the enemy."

"He's not the enemy. He's just here to make sure we're not ogres. He was very reassuring when he interviewed me. You'll like him."

"I only talked to him for a minute. He and James weren't quite done and James told me the two of you were hiding out in here."

He took off his tie and hung it on the rack in the closet, then went into the bathroom for a minute. When he came back he sat down on the side of the bed. Connor climbed up next to him. Just then James knocked on the door and stuck his head in.

"You're next, Ben." He came into the room.

Ben grabbed Connor. "Mind if I take your pacifier with me, babe? We barely had a chance to say hello."

"Sure, go ahead. James can help me put away the toys while you're talking."

I wanted to talk to James and make sure he was feeling all right after his interview. He'd been spending lots of time with his therapist but he still wasn't good about strangers. I knew Ben was offering to take Connor with him to give us a chance to talk.

"Are you okay, James?"

"Yeah, it was easier than I thought it would be. I wasn't sure how I'd react having to talk about the pills and being gay with somebody new, but he was really easy to talk to. Turns out he grew up in foster homes so he knows what it's like having to change families, although he said he never knew his real parents. He was pretty cool and understanding."

"He seems to really like kids so that probably makes him good at his job. I just hope we pass the test with him."

James got up from the chair he was sitting in and came over and sat next to me on the bed. He put his arm around me and lay his head on my shoulder.

"They're not gonna take Connor away from you, Uncle Joey. They just can't. You're the best father I've ever seen."

"I keep telling myself I have nothing to worry about but I won’t be able to relax until this is all over."

James held me for a while and at some point I realized what great progress this was for him that he was able to comfort someone else. Ben came in after a while to let us know the interviews were over. We all went out into the family room to say goodbye to Charles.

"It's been a pleasure meeting your family, Joey. I'll submit my report to the family court by the end of the week and then they'll schedule a hearing. We try not to let these things drag on."

"It can't be soon enough for me. This whole thing has shaken my world and I won’t sleep well until it's over."

"I wouldn't worry too much. My primary concern is the well being of children and that obviously takes into account the families they are a part of. From what I've seen today, there is a lot of love in this household."

"Joey and I know that but some people refuse to see it."

"I'm just an independent fact-finder here and I'm not supposed to take sides, but let me tell you that I have rarely been called in to check out such a normal, loving family unit. I can't imagine that there is any basis for this case."

"Just the idea that I'm gay is enough for some people to think I'm not a good father."

"Well, be assured that that doesn't enter into it at all as far as I'm concerned. Or the state either. I'll probably see you all at the hearing. It was very nice meeting you."

He shook hands all around and left. I felt it had gone a lot better that I had envisioned. While he had been very professional, he had also been understanding and compassionate, two traits I didn't expect from a government bureaucrat.

Ben

I was somewhat surprised by my interview with the social worker. I'd been expecting to have to be on the defense with him but instead it reminded me a lot of my appointment that morning with Paul. In both cases they were thoroughly professional, yet they both seemed understanding and on my side. That was to be expected from Paul, but the social worker was a stranger and supposedly a neutral government worker. We all talked over our reactions over dinner and agreed it had gone well.

"Was it just me or did you guys get the feeling that he might be gay?"

"Why, James? Did you feel like he was coming on to you?"

"Oh no, nothing like that, Uncle Joey. If I thought that I would have been really uncomfortable. But there was just something, I don’t know..."

"Ah, it looks like your fledgling gaydar is starting to kick in."

"Gaydar? What's that, Ben?"

"Lots of gay guys think they have a sixth sense of sorts about being able to tell who else is gay."

"You mean like ESP?"

"Yeah, but it's probably less mysterious than that. Most gay people have spent at least a little time in the closet, so we know what it's like to cover up and try to hide. So then we know what to look for in others. Besides, it never occurs to most straight people that there might be gay people around them so they're not looking for anything. We're aware that some people are gay so we're always looking for signs."

"Some guys are really effeminate so they're easy for anyone to pick out. There's one kid in my class at school like that."

"Don’t be fooled by stereotypes, James. The most effeminate guy in my high school class was also one of the straightest guys I've ever known. It's not always obvious. But I agree with your assessment of this guy Charles. I thought he was probably gay as well."

Joey frowned. "But he was wearing a wedding ring."

"Lots of gay couples wear rings. I was going to suggest that we think about that now that we're officially partners."

"I'd like that. Maybe we can get them when we have our party to celebrate. But I didn't see anything to suggest that Charles wasn't straight. Maybe I'm not really gay since I don’t seem to have any gaydar at all."

"Well, there was nothing obvious about him, nothing specific I could put my finger on. Besides, you were a lot more emotionally wound up over this so your mind was preoccupied and you weren't thinking along those lines."

"Yeah, Uncle Joey. And don’t forget, I hear the sounds coming from your bedroom most nights. Take my word for it. You're gay."